Today at church I gained a little perspective. Everyone has been doing the "thankfulness posts" (me included), and I'm not going to lie, sometimes, I sit and really have to thank at the end of the day about what I'm thankful for. Anyway, today at church, one of the men was talking about Thanksgiving and how we should have "an attitude of gratitude." This really struck me. Because honestly, I have spent the last 18 months constantly focusing on what is going wrong in my life, and how bad it all is. When I actually stop to think about it, no wonder I've been so miserable. I've never been one to thrive around negativity(really, do any of us?) and I have been breeding in myself for over a year. Why is it so easy to see the negative instead of the positive? I know for me, if I am continually around negative, grumpy people, it becomes contagious....meaning I GET GRUMPY TOO! Negative Nancy!
So, today, I'm choosing to actively change my attitude. Not just for this season that we are "supposed to be thankful," but back to what I like to think of as "normal Cristina." Happy, positive, cheery, look on the bright side, glass half full kind of girl. I have a good friend who has been coaching me to "take captive your thoughts." At first, it annoyed me, like I was just going to be able to stop thinking things that made me sad or angry, but in reality, she was telling me that I own my thoughts. Yes, sad & infuriating thoughts will cross my mind, but how I choose to handle them is up to me. I know this will not be easy, but I also know that I like myself a whole lot more when I am "normal Cristina" (see description above). I have said for years, "I don't like me when I'm grumpy, I'm sure no one else does either!" So here we go, a few days before the big "Thankfulness day", join me in seeing the bright side, and not the negative first. And, maybe, just MAYBE, if I start focusing on the brighter side of things, that the darkness won't be so noticeable! :-)